#2 – You’ll find someone eventually, just be patient.
Anytime I hear this, my instinct is to reply ‘how do you know?’ For a lot of ppl this statement will turn out to be true – but not for all people.
There are three main problems I see with this.
First is that I don’t think it’s a good idea to make promises to people that you won’t or in this case can’t keep. This is something that is beyond your control – God is the only one making this decision.
The second thing that is a problem is the conversation that flows if I do ask the question ‘how do you know?’ The answer is going to be something like a list of all my great qualities that make me worthy of being married, and making marriage something that is based on worth doesn’t seem like a good idea to me – but more on this next time.
Thirdly – and I think this is my biggest issue here – is that this, for some people, is an invitation to live a life in waiting. Waiting for marriage to come along and solve all our problems. Maybe this seems like a big jump but I think there is a certain part of us that is already living this way so it doesn’t take much to justify it. But we can’t live life waiting for our circumstances to change, we need to live and serve God NOW.
In 1 Corinthians 7 Paul describes singleness as gift. Interestingly the Greek word he uses – carisma (charisma – literally ‘grace gift’) – is the same word he uses in chapter 12 about spiritual gifts.
Singleness is a gift. How do you know if you have the gift of singleness?? Are you single right now? If you’re single you have the gift! And that doesn’t mean your situation won’t change, but right at this moment you have a ‘grace gift’. I think its important to work out, just like all other gifts from God, how do I use this to serve him, my church, and my Christians brothers and sisters. Sometimes its hard for single people to see their singleness as a gift, and I actually think the best people to remind us of why it is, and encourage us to use it to God’s glory, are our married friends.
And hopefully at the same time we can remind you of the gift that marriage is and encourage you to be married to God’s glory.
Always for Jesus’ fame.