Well exams for this semester are done and I have to say even though this time I only had 3 exams – compared to 6 at the end of last year – I feel much more exhausted this time around. I’m not sure why but stress really got the better of me at the end of last week and despite going into hiding at my folks place on the weekend I am having a hard time getting back to being myself again.

But here is something that never ceases to amaze me and that has brought me a lot of comfort over the last few days. In the process of studying for my New Testament exam I had the pleasure of working with 2 brillo friends and translating and chatting about this –

Later, knowing that all was now completed, and so that the Scripture would be fulfilled, Jesus said, “I am thirsty.” A jar of wine vinegar was there, so they soaked a sponge in it, put the sponge on a stalk of the hyssop plant, and lifted it to Jesus’ lips. When he had received the drink, Jesus said, “It is finished.” With that, he bowed his head and gave up his spirit.

Now it was the day of Preparation, and the next day was to be a special Sabbath. Because the Jews did not want the bodies left on the crosses during the Sabbath, they asked Pilate to have the legs broken and the bodies taken down. The soldiers therefore came and broke the legs of the first man who had been crucified with Jesus, and then those of the other. But when they came to Jesus and found that he was already dead, they did not break his legs. Instead, one of the soldiers pierced Jesus’ side with a spear, bringing a sudden flow of blood and water. The man who saw it has given testimony, and his testimony is true. He knows that he tells the truth, and he testifies so that you also may believe. These things happened so that the scripture would be fulfilled: “Not one of his bones will be broken,” and, as another scripture says, “They will look on the one they have pierced”.

What an amazing display of Jesus’ sovereignty and therefore willingness in his own death. Without even talking about the fact that everything that happened fullfilled scripture written AGES before that, I am always blown away by this line –

With that, he bowed his head and gave up his spirit.

In this day and age we are some determined that ‘its my life and i’ll do what I want’ and yet as hard as we try we can never just decide to give up our spirit and die. But Jesus can! Because as much as we want to be god, Jesus IS God and, in what might be seen as his darkest hour, he showed that in a way that I find astounding.

And he was not just in control of his life but he is control in all things. I’m so glad that he is cause if it was up to me what a mess I would make – especially now.